Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Randomize
