No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Everyone says I win the strip club
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
