chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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