ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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