I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
