I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think a kid would responsible me up
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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