i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
