I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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