I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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