I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
