well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
