Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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