Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Found the puke drawer
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
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