I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
