so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
