C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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