1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
