Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
