I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
