in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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