I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
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