she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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