Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
