When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
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