I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
