Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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