I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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