problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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