I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
