I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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