Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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