Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
