Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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