I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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