He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
