I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
