Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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