The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
