I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
