Buhtt sex?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
then he tried to convert me to islam
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
