does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
