Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
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I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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