If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
