Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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