possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
