On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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