And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
