i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
