im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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