drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
